Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Christmas morning

Last Christmas, after Lincoln's train table, I promised Nate no large items for Christmas. A four foot giraffe, art easel, giant fire station and ride on train later, I realized there was a reason we agreed to this. Nate and I had to rearrange our living room( moved the couch into the dining room) to fit Lincoln's train in for Christmas morning! Maybe next year I'll listen. I just can't pass up a good deal! 
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Monday, December 24, 2012

merry christmas eve

I bought outfits for our Christmas cards, I had my sister take pictures  for our Christmas cards, I ordered Christmas cards, and I still have Christmas cards sitting on my counter. Whoops! Oh well, Merry Christmas everyone!

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Sunday, December 23, 2012

here comes santa claus

Nate had a day off work a few weeks ago and we took the kiddos to Union Station and Crown Center to meet Santa Claus. I figured Hazel would totally flip out on Santa's lap. She is totally going through the stranger anxiety stage of life. But, she played it cool. I tired to help Lincoln prepare an answer for when Santa asked him what he wants for Christmas. But, he froze up and told him "I dunno." So much for preparation! I don't think he quite gets this whole Santa Claus thing yet. Maybe next year! 

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You have no idea how hard it was to get him to sit by the tree for a picture.
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Taking a break... it's a long walk to see Santa
He didn't know what to do with himself!

I picked out a special bow for Hazel, and it fell off the headband. I cannot believe she had to be bow-less her first time meeting Santa.. how embarrassing. :) 
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Monday, December 17, 2012

home for the holidays

I love decorating for the holidays!
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My sister drew this awesome Santa picture for my chalkboard!
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I love this picture of Lincoln playing with his truck and Hazel just hanging out. 
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Thursday, December 13, 2012

#notreallyhappening

When I was 11 weeks pregnant with Hazel I started to have some minor complications and had to take a trip to the ER. The ultrasound tech asked me if I wanted a boy or girl. Before I could answer he blurted out "And don't say it doesn't matter, I just want a healthy baby. That's just a given." He was right, that was a given. It was so much a given I really didn't even think twice about it. So I blurted out "a girl." It's hard when your pregnant to tell everyone what gender you really want. You don't want them to think you are disappointed when you get the opposite. But, it was true. I wanted a girl and from then on I let everyone know that I wanted a girl. I  have an amazing little boy and I couldn't imagine going through life without having a daughter.

Fast forward to now and I'm looking backing thinking maybe I should have just said a healthy baby. Would that have changed things? Maybe things would be different if I didn't paint when I was pregnant, or carry those Christmas decorations up the stairs. Deep down I know none of these things are true. I did nothing to make Hazel unhealthy.  I know from the beginning of time this is who Hazel is suppose to be. I know I was chosen to be her mother and  I am going to have to help her be the strong, amazing woman I know she is going to be and she is going to make me the strong, amazing woman I have to be. But, right now,this is the beginning. I'm in denial, I'm a hot mess. I just want shut my door,hide in my room and cuddle her for the next 18 years. 


Hazel's Story:

Nate and I have noticed for the past couple of months that something was "off" with Hazel. Her shoulder was higher on her left side, she never turned her head to the left and seemed to have a curve in her spine. Our Pediatrician (at the time) assured us that we were being worried parents and everything was fine. Luckily, we decided to get a second opinion. Through an ultrasound and X-Ray we have discovered that Hazel has only one kidney, a deformity with her left scapula (sprengel's deformity), and lots of concerns with her spine.(scoliosis, fused vertebrae etc) We have also discovered through a test called a VCUG that Hazel's bladder is not anatomically correct and she has vesicoureteral reflux. Right now everything is still so unknown. But her Doctors are speculating that Hazel has a rare skeletal disorder called Klippel-Feil Syndrome. 
PS - Google does a much better job then me at explaining all this medical lingo.

We are currently in the process of getting a million tests done. It is awful, but I know these tests are going to help her. I'm so thankful for all the support from my friends and family. I'm hoping in the next few months her Doctors can pinpoint exactly what she has and what they can do to help her.  As for now, I'm forcing myself to open my door, come out of my room and be the parent I have to be for Lincoln and Hazel. But, I'm not pretending to be super mom. As soon as they go to bed and I'm going straight back to my room and shutting my door. Who am I kidding-I'm bringing a tub of ice cream with me. 



On our way to the Kidney Center at Children's Mercy. So lucky to have Katy helping us! 
 How cute are these baby gowns?!?






Sunday, December 2, 2012

1/2 year


Happy 1/2 birthday, Hazel Baby! We love watching you grow, explore and learn something new everyday! We can't wait to see what the next 6 months bring! 

14 lbs- 11% (a wee baby,  Lincoln was 15 lbs at 3 months)
24.5 inches long-13%
42cm head circumference-36%
waking up 4-5 times a night- bleh, but I do love to rock and snuggle with you
two naps a day- about an hour each and then a 15min power nap in the early evening
crazy lady hair-  mohawk or combover? such a hard decision for me






Ripping my sticker off







6 month check-up

Caught this sweet moment on camera
Almost big enough..almost
ps. How awesome is this vintage high chair? I have been looking on Craig's list for one (like a crazy lady) and my cousin found one right down the street for a steal! Love her for hooking a cousin up!